Kyunki saas bhi kabhi 'serial-heroine' thi

What happens when there are times when the only thing that your mum wants to watch on TV are sad stories about several families, each with it's own share of 'good' and 'evil' women, all of whom have no real purpose in the world other than to cry or make absurd faces and make others cry?

You become ME. Someone who detests anything remotely soap-ish or serial-ish in Hindi/Tamil.

Let me give you an example of what I'm talking about:
Most serials have a protagonist who is basically a sad woman of the house who has a lot more responsibility other than just being a woman of the house.

• She leads by example.
• She supports the family.
• She murders the 'evil' landlord for the family and goes to prison.
• She stands up against the scariest of gundas.
• She is the consummate self-sacrificer who will do anything to keep the family in good spirits.
• She will see her family through all it's suffering, bravely pacifying the stupid younger brother, the helpless husband who's family kicks him out of his house, the sister who's marriage was earlier stalled by the protagonist's business competitors.
• She will have a father with a zillion wives.
• She will have a husband who is in love with her sister.
• She will be the woman that every woman( and man, seriously!?!?!) who watches these soaps wants to be.
• She will quite literally be the SuperWoman \m/
  

Why would an idea that seems so absurd on paper, actually work in reality?

Possible Answers:

1. Wait, maybe it's not all that absurd, seeing that there are a few households where it really happens.. (ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND? If there is a family as dysfunctional as the Garodia Khandan or the Walia Parivar, there would be no reason for soaps to work. Because people want to see what can happen when that actually is the case.
2. Maybe because it is what every house-wife imagines herself to be, an idyllic housewife if you might. (Quite possible, but I can show you a zillion other much less dramatic examples)
3. Maybe because women power is the in thing and you are a fool for not realizing that. Stop being such an MCP! (I'll stop when there are male protagonists.)
4. Mybe because it's a good way to pass time. (Why on earth were Books, Games, ENGLISH Movies and Sports invented!?!?!?! WHY!?!)
   
5. Maybe because Ekta Kapoor is consideraly richer than you are because she knows what she's doing and you should just shut up and stop writing. (Maybe, maybe not. Still, that's not gonna stop me from calling something that's absurd ABSURD! Deal with it)

Some trends I've noticed:

• 'Evil' women in the soaps have extremely arched eyebrows and usually wear dark, scary nail gloss and lipstick.
• 'Evil' women have all the fancy names.
• Some of the names of 'Evil' men in the soaps are downright hilarious.
• Even the richest of families undergo a severe monetary crisis.
• Court cases invariably have a female lawyer who gets trounced by her male counterpart in the first argument, but comes back very strongly in the second and wins the case for her client.
• Soaps that have run for more than a year on a 4/5 days a week basis rin for at least another year(rather than being banned from TV-space for all eternity).
• There is always a dirty cop.
• There is always a disgusting in-law in the family (or one with a shady past).
• Someone gets pushed off a cliff (By far the most favourite way to kill off characters).
• Actors get replaced every now and again when their roles in the serials change accordingly.
• The 'evil' people make pacts with one of the good people and work from the inside.
• Actors who are reasonably successful in one soap invariably act in a multitude of others in quick succession leaving the older watchers of television in complete disarray as to what happens in one episode.
• The title song for most soaps have the most awesome singers in the industry rendering the vocals.
• The background music used in most soaps are either loud repetitive beats or sad howling, and in some cases slowed down versions of popular movie songs (read Hindi soaps).
• 100% of the soaps suck. But there is the occasional AWESOME character who lights things up.

Yes, I would love to continue venting, but it is already quite long and I won't take any more of your time. Yes, I would have to watch a lot of serials to know all this. With grandparents visiting every now and again with a solid 1800-2300hrs slot assigned for tamil serials and reruns of Hindi serials screened during that time in the mornings and afternoons with a mum who loves watching them exactly when there's some activity on the dining table, I have little choice.

Cliched title again? Who cares...

Tee Vee

What do you call a person who watches around about 4 tv shows on and off, 5 feverishly, 4 till they got over and still wants to watch some more?

The Mind #2

Palak Paneer.

Mangoes(home-grown Alphonso from a 40 year old tree).

Homemade chocolates

• Marshmallow-stuffed.
• Rice-crispies coated.
• Mint-centred.
• Fudge(microwaved for 5-8 seconds at 100%).
• Dark with hazelnut.
  

Halwa

• frozen and thawed till it's just right(it doesn't get rock hard)
• microwaved for 12 seconds at 100%
  

Minute Maid(fresh out of the fridge)

The Mind

Poker.
Eloisa to Abelard.
Iris.
Final Fantasy.
Reebok.
Scarlett Johansson.
Differential Thermal Analysis.
Manchester United vs Arsenal.
Antidisestablishmentarianism.
Treasure Hunts.
Ninja.
Skagen.
IEEE.


Peace

A morning in the life of a 19-yr old. Or Not.

This one is for those of you who identify with morning blues. The one's who don't can continue being the one's who 'hold my bus'. (See 0725)
This is how the average day 'rolls'.

0600: My alarm(Glasgow Kiss-yeah baby!) goes off, invariably i'm too sound asleep to realize and the wake-up-tool is rendered useless.
0630: My mom runs into my room, wakes me up, which is a 5-minute process involving turning on the light(Yes, I can't go back to sleep then-it works)/ throwing a pillow at me(She says she's picking up the one that's fallen off the bed, but I know better)/ pouring a couple drops of cold water on my face, or just scaring me by telling me it's 7 and that I'll miss the bus(the last one works the best, mind you).
0650: I wake up, look at the time, and get what I think is the last five minutes of sleep, turns out to be more like 15,
0705: I practically jump off the bed and hurriedly freshen up in 10 minutes(Yes, I brush, shower, change and pack my bag that quick. no kidding), and mom yells to see that i'm actually finally awake, when I run down to eat some breakfast(weird porridge involving banana, oats, some museli and corn flakes), which is impossible to down in under 10 minutes, no matter how hard you try.
0723: I search all over for socks, find them, wear my shoes in under 15 seconds on average, and run out of the house checking to see that my pockets have my wallet, my phone and my ID card, in that order.
0725: Text message a friend 'Hold Bus' while I'm walking towards the bus stop only to the now yellow-coloured vehicle leaving, when I decide to run after and get on it a 100 yards away. My friends congratulate me on my achievement.
0730: Turn on the iPod. Sleep like a log.
0830: Wake up to see I'm in college and that I've a whole day ahead of me.


And that's just the morning.

This is what happens most days.
Some days, I miss the bus, frantically call dad up and ask him to drop me off at the next bus stop, where a bus that leaves later is my ride to college.
Some days, I get up reasonably on time. Some days. ;)
Some days, college just doesn't work. Most days :D

"All's well that ends well"

The System

Once, when I was asked why there are rules, I realized something that astounded and scared me at the same time.

My best answer-'So we can follow them'.

I mean, apart from the 'goody two-shoes' explanations involving rules being a moral code of conduct to do with right and wrong, or rules being enforced so people can become conscious citizens of a country or a zillion other frivolous reasons I can think of, I can't come up with one solid reason for rules to be established and enforced in each institution or organization or country for that matter.

The people who do follow rules generally do for their loyalty towards the cause or because they don't have a valid reason not to, I mean, that would be more of a case of nothing better to do.

The ones that don't can ever so easily be hypocritical and just say the same stuff I am saying, the only difference being that I can't see any reason why I follow rules either, but I still do most of the time, in spite of bending them here and there for reasons that are beside the point.

The point of the matter here being that law and order and everything to do with governing or running a country involves rules and regulations and enforcement of these rules are done, well, let's just say reasonably satisfactorily enough. Although people follow the rules for fear of being penalized for not following them, and mind you, the penalties can be quite severe, there aren't many people I know who would raise a hand when asked whether they have always followed rules and whether they can justify why they did.

Not to be cynical or unfairly critical either, but I'd really like to see someone step up and prove me wrong.

Peace.

My own personal little record

6 posts in an hour and 16 minutes

even if one wasn't well and truly mine.

Adzap

I took part in a mixed bag event at college called Pandora's Box, Adzap was one round.

For those of you who have never ever attended the Culturals of a school or college in India, more specifically, the places where i've been around, an Adzap event involves making an ad and successfully endorsing a wacky product that would generally not be found at the local store:
some topics being...

• Face whitening pickles
• A Toothless comb
• A dial-less watch and..

weirdly enough, we got Aluminium Jewelry, the advertisement for which was more of a one-person act, two people mime ad, which though reasonably creative and on-the-go was barely beyond 'okay'. One other interesting topic, whose teaser I came up with:

• A Butter stick(as in lip stick, chap stick...) - Does your boyfriend like food more than you? Try out our latest butter stick and see what happens ;) (Oh yes, that ad was primarily targeted at the female audience).

Yes, I can go crazy at times.
So?
Sue me :D

The Pursuit of Aditya-ness

A person once told me that a person she knew once told her, "Do one thing everyday, that you haven't done before, and wouldn't do unless you specifically set out to do it."

Right.

So, a good 4 years after I was told, I decide to give it a test run and see if I can actually do it.
I will catalogue my efforts in the blog, editing this post, let's see what I end up doing.

Start date: March 30th, 2009

Post Australian GP 2009

Podium:

1. Jenson Button (Brawn Mercedes)
2. Rubens Barrichello (Brawn Mercedes)
3. Jarno Trulli (Toyota), later converted to Lewis Hamilton(McLaren Mercedes) because Trulli apparently overtook under the safety car and was given a 25 second penalty on his race time.


Post race conversation between Button and Barrichello,
who qualified 1-2 for the Brawn Racing Team:
(Barrichello had a bad start and dropped back to 10th or it's whereabouts)

Button: Where were you after the start of the race, mate?
Barrichello: Oh, I got held up a bit.


This one's for the Brawn Racing Team, from being a Honda Team almost out of Formula One, to being bought by Ross Brawn about 4 weeks before the start of the season, with no sponsors till a week before the race when Sir Richard Branson proudly agreed to Virgin being the main(and only) sponsors to less than a week of testing to produce a 1-2 in Qualifying and the Race.

Hats Off..

Randomness

Ever felt like you want to write, but you have no specific topic in mind and the topics that others give you aren't what you want to write about right now and you somehow have a feeling that writing about how you feel at that precise moment will make you feel better and will somehow miraculously help your brain sprout a new thought, or an idea or a topic to write on?


Welcome to my world.....

I'm no.... I'm no Superman...

Out the door just in time
Head down the 405
Gotta meet the new boss by 8 a.m.
The phone rings in the car
The wife is workin' hard
She's running late tonight again

Well
I know what I've been told,
You got to work to feed the soul
But I can't do this all on my own
No, I know, I'm no Superman
I'm no Superman

You've got your love online
You think you're doing fine
But you're just plugged into the wall

And that deck of tarot cards
Won't get you very far
There ain't no hand to break your fall

Well
I know what I've been told
You gotta know just when to fold
But I can't do this all on my own
No, I know, I'm no Superman
I'm no Superman

That's right

You've crossed the finish line
Won the race but lost your mind
Was it worth it after all

I need you here with me
Cause love is all we need
Just take a hold of the hand that breaks the fall

Well I know what I've been told
Gotta break free to break the mold
But I can't do this all on my own
No I can't do this all on my own
I know that I'm no Superman
I'm no Superman
I'm no Superman

Someday we'll be together
I'm no Superman
Someday
Someday we'll be together
Someday
I'm no Superman

Ridiculous advertisement #1

This Dove ad in which the model attempts to show the difference between using dove and other soaps by using Dove on one half of her face and other random soaps on the other.....



The end result, though, by all practical means of argument she should become Harvey "Two Face", she ends up with graphically enhanced skin that has a sun like glow and never-before-seen fairness and softness.

Thi13een

Right

So, everyone's making lists, most people tend to round it off to a nice number, what's wrong with 13? Here I go, with the 13 most random things I can think of...

1. I think I'm awesome, don't care who objects, don't want to know.(Please don't!)

2. 'Weird' is the most underrated word in the English language. It can stand for basically anything and I think it's the coolest word there is. (I go through 'cool word' phases)
(It also violates the ' 'i' before 'e' except after 'c' rule' for spelling, which I think is cool again.)

3. I have always wondered whether the caesura* comes before the parentheses or inside them or after them. (I know I should've paid more attention in English class).

4. I think English class is a waste of time. I mean, for how long do I have to flaunt my vocabulary to prove to the world that I know English? (I also happen to think no end of myself).

5. I like movies, not because they take you into a world full of surprises and mystery and fantasy and not because they are awesome(well, partly that too), but basically because I like movies. (call me 'King of the obvious', but ain't we all?)

6. What never ceases to amaze me is why people abbreviate the names of movies and tv shows(especially Hindi movies), which makes them sound rather pathetic, and why they go about trying to make the abbreviation sound like a word (Why? Oh Why??), which just makes it all the more retarded. eg:K3G,K2H2, we're talking movies here, not Chemistry.

7. College is a funny word that a lot of people mispronounce and misspell as 'collage', but I guess every college can metaphorically be interpreted to be a bunch of papers that must be cut into varied shapes and stuck together to make them 'look' nice. I don't know why I tend to get so philosophical.

8. I love the game Wolf 3-D. It is one of the earliest games I played and call me weird, but nothing I have played over the years seems to give me quite the same rush that taking down Hitler (with the Nazi** anthem blaring in the background) did.

9. 'Nazi' sounds awesome. I said sounds. Don't brand me now. Not yet at least.

10. My blog is called 'freakymindatwork.blogspot.com' and the headline says 'Freaks of the World UNITE!!' which quite frankly seems very five-year-old to me, but I still seem to like it. Can't quite make myself change either( or maybe, just maybe I'm too lazy too).

11. My internet connection likes to take frequent bathroom breaks, but of late I have started to suspect diarrhoea or dysentry or whatever it is that makes you hit the can even other minute. Maybe it needs some Immodium***. (Yeah, I make very weird metaphors).

12. 13 is a nice number. It doesn't seem to possess any vice, It doesn't seem to want to attack me when my back is turned and It doesn'y say a word when I yell at it(I don't yell at numbers, come on, I was just spitballing****.) Yes, those are the criteria by which I judge people as well (or maybe I'm just twisted).

13. See No.1
(I am OBSESSED with the word).


*caesura-what I originally thought to be a stop or a pause, which my English Lecturer specifically mentioned to be a full stop. My arguements about the generic-ness of the Caesura went un-respected and un-noticed and WHY? Because I didn't possess a whatever degree my English Lecturer has (I actually don't mind being told I'm wrong once in a while, so that was fun).

**Nazi- just GO away if you don't know what it means. Though, actually, it is a complicated term. Bah, just go away.

***Immodium - The drug that can give you relief like no other.
Let me run by you, what a possible ad for Immodium 'could' look like:

A boy wakes up in the morning and realizes he is late for school. He runs downstairs to brush but realizes that nature is calling him at a very high intensity and runs off into the toilet.
He comes out and complains to Mom,
Son: 'Ma, I need to go to the toilet again and again. What do i do???? :('
Ma: 'Don't worry beta, have an Immodium!'
Son: 'Thank you Ma, You're the best!'
Ma: Don't thank me beta, thank Immodium!
(happy music plays)
Ma and Son(smiling) and chorus: Thank you Immodium!

****spitballing-I have no idea what on earth it could possibly mean, but pitchers in baseball spit on the palm of their hand or their glove or whatever to influence the path of the ball, and I presume that could be a possible origin, or it could be the balling of spit in a person's mouth accompanied by the 'aaarchhhh' sound, and I presume that it is an equivalent to brainstorming.


Peace.




P.S. Please note how dramatic I have made the title sound!

Opeth-ed, Saarang-ed

Hi,

I'd like to introduce you to two new words...

Opeth-ed (v)
The feeling one is overcome by when he/she suddenly, uncontrollably 'head-bangs*' and 'air-guitars**' while listening to the music of a Heavy Metal/Death Metal band, which he/she might not be very familiar with(i.e., has heard a lot of in the week/month preceding, but not much else before) and falls in love with thereafter.

eg: Chennai was Opeth-ed on 26th January 2009


Saarang-ed (v)
The feeling one is overcome with when he/she goes to a cultural festival expecting to have one hell of a lot of fun, but ends up having more than just that, which leaves the experience undergone by the person purely undefinable and open to the interpretation of the world's generalia.

eg: I was Saarang-ed.


*Headbanging is a type of dance which involves violently shaking the head in time with music, most commonly rock music and heavy metal music.

**Playing air guitar is a form of dance and movement in which the performer pretends to play rock or heavy metal-style electric guitar solos. Playing an air guitar usually consists of exaggerated strumming and picking motions and is often coupled with loud singing or lip-synching. Air guitar is generally used in the imaginary simulation of loud electric guitar music.